Lost in the Fog

It takes someone with a peculiar kind of vision to build a racecourse – but even so, back in 1802, most people must have thought that the third Duke of Richmond had completely lost his marbles.

 

Goodwood may be one of the most beautiful racecourses in the country, but the track plots a precarious path along a high ridge of the South Downs and boasts some unusual cambers. Unlike Cartmel, there is no circuit for the horses to go round and around. In the longest races the horses start near the Grandstands, gallop away, disappear around a short loop and then head back down towards the stands again – in a similar format to Salisbury and Hamilton Park.

 

Shorter races are started far away from the stands at various points around the loop. In 1988, during the 1m 2f Festival Stakes, the runners set off in the wrong direction – taking the shortest way around the loop instead of the longest. The race was made void (depriving dual Eclipse Stakes winner Mtoto of the first prize money), although the starter’s error had a happy outcome – with the accidental discovery of a new starting position for 1m 1f races.

 

It’s possible that, on some days, no one would have noticed the horses galloping in the wrong direction, as the racecourse is vulnerable to sea frets – a thick fog which rolls in on the tide. During the first half of the 19th Century, it is claimed that John Barham Day (a prominent racehorse trainer) won a major sprint by sending one of his opponents in the wrong direction. The racecourse wasn’t fully enclosed at the time and Day met a stable-lad, who happened to be leading the favourite for the race, lost in the fog. Day, who trained at the nearby village of Findon, knew exactly which direction the horse should have been heading - but he still sent the unfortunate lad back down the hill and away from the track.

 

It’s one of those lovely stories, akin to the tales of crooked-goings-on behind the trees on the home bend at Cartmel – before a sixth camera was installed to capture the action there. But don’t expect any such skulduggery ahead of the Stewards Cup on Saturday; Goodwood enjoys a reputation heavily laced with old-English charm, but it is now a thoroughly modern racecourse boasting world-class facilities for both horses and racegoers.

 

The Stewards Cup is usually won by a sprinter on the upgrade – a useful performer with the potential to become a Group race winner. Step forward Dancing Star, who runs in the same colours as the popular 1992 winner Lochsong – known to her many fans as the ‘pocket rocket’. A filly, just like Lochsong, and trained by Andrew Balding, whose father trained Lochsong, Dancing Star is out to repeat a little piece of history for her connections.

 

Having already won four of her seven races, including one at Goodwood in June, Dancing Star is our tip for the weekend. Let’s just hope she runs in the right direction.

Rewind and Replay

The steeplechase track at Cartmel has the longest run-in of any jumps track in the country. No one will know that better than Henry Brooke - who jumped the last fence bare back on Monday, completing the final five furlongs of the race with the saddle hanging half way around Altruism's belly.

Having lost the lead (and almost his saddle) through a blunder at the second last obstacle, Altruism battled back manfully and failed by just 3/4 of a length to reel in his stable-mate, Fantasy King, at the finish. Fortunately Henry Brooke managed to cling on to all of his tack and managed to weigh-in successfully for second place.

There are some sights on a race-day, like the groom-to-be wearing a lime-green ‘mankini’, that you wish you’d never seen at all – while there are others, like Brooke's recovery, that you want to watch again and again.

Racing UK didn’t take their cameras across to the party tents in the Tented Village, so viewers at home remained blissfully unaware of the sartorial crimes that took place among the stag and hen parties on Saturday. Which is not to say that there weren't some very well dressed racegoers too - like the many ladies in hats and totally impractical heels.

Fortunately, Racing UK did capture all of the races from Cartmel on both days of the Barbecue Meeting - which means that subscribers can rewind and watch the races again and again (even the ones at Market Rasen, which they missed because they came racing at Cartmel).

The facility to rewind and replay, is one of the many benefits afforded by Racing UK Anywhere – a subscription package which allows the user to watch via a variety of platforms including Sky, Freeview, Desktop, iPad, iPhone, Android or Mobile Web. If you only ever want to watch Cartmel, you don’t even have to subscribe for a full year – day passes are available for £10.

There has been a debate in the racing press about TV coverage recently, predominately around the question of how much of each programme should be spent talking about betting and how long the presenters should develop the stories behind the personalities involved in the sport. The Racing UK presenters give added insight into the form of each race – so I’m confident that they’ll agree with my selection for the weekend, Her Majesty the Queen’s Dartmouth in the King George VI and Queen Elizabeth Stakes, at Ascot, on Saturday.

I like it when the presenters talk about the colourful side of the sport too - but you'll be able to watch Saturday's action on Racing UK safe in the knowledge that they won’t feature any images of racegoers wearing mankinis – even at Ascot.

Free Food and Shiny Hair

I love free food. And I’m not just talking about the delicious ham and cheese sandwich which was prepared for me moments ago by Anthea Morshead, our Clerk of the Course. Is there nothing that Anthea won’t do to ensure that racing at Cartmel runs according to schedule?  

We replaced our hanging baskets after the June meeting with some fresh displays, planted exclusively with a creamy-white variety of nasturtium called ‘Milkmaid’. The peppery leaves are delicious in a salad, while the flowers are edible too – the perfect garnish for a classy picnic or barbecue at the races. Which is my way of reminding you that, if you’re heading this way on Saturday or Monday, we’re offering a prize for the most stylish picnic at the races. There’ll be a hamper full of delicious local produce, for the winner, as well as tickets to a future race-meeting. 

We don’t expect racegoers to dress up – although you're welcome to do so if you wish... Perhaps we’ll give a prize for the most colourful wellington boots – although I hope it won’t be necessary; the forecast for Saturday and Monday is looking increasingly fine. The judges will be looking for colourful picnic blankets and innovative food – so if you’ve ever wanted to have a go at smoking cockles, under a ceramic pot, over a few oak chips (à la Jamie Oliver & friends), now is the time to give it a try.

But if it were me, I’d stick to the free stuff. At the north end of the racecourse, on the far side of the track in the overflow car park, you’ll find several patches of wild sorrel – delicious when mixed with the nasturtiums from the hanging baskets. If we’re lucky we’ll even be able to find a few un-ripened seeds from the nasturtiums which, when mixed with cream cheese, are an excellent replacement for capers and make a fantastic accompaniment to Furness Fish & Game's delicious venison burgers. The venison burgers aren’t free – but they can be purchased in packs (ready for your own barbecue) from their stand in the Tented Village.

Eat like this and you’ll be healthy too. Apparently the nasturtiums are packed full of Vitamin C and have a natural anti-biotic and anti-viral effect – staving off the symptoms of cold and flu. Plus, when mashed to a pulp and steeped in water for 12 hours, they create a beneficial hair supplement – stimulating the tiny capillaries in the scalp to promote growth.

I’ve read that somewhere – but, now that I think about it, I’m not entirely sure whether you’re supposed to treat the resulting paste as a lotion or a potion. Perhaps we could experiment by giving some to the jockeys in the £10,000 Banks Lyon Jewellers Lady Riders Handicap Hurdle. Some can drink it, some can use it as shampoo – and we’ll see who has the shiniest hair. I bet it’s Lizzie Kelly – who rides this week's selection, Lyric Street, for trainer Donald McCain.

A Thimble Full of Diamonds

While the village of Cartmel has been described as a ‘thimble-full of diamonds’, the racecourse has been compared to a beautiful bloom – fragrant and colourful, yet fleeting in appearance due to the short Summer season.

It’s therefore fitting that the winning jockey, of the Banks Lyon Jewellers Lady Riders Handicap Hurdle Race on Saturday 16th July, will pick up a £5,000 diamond cluster pendant featuring a classic flower design. The pendant is made from 18ct white gold, set with seven fiery and spectacular brilliant cut diamonds totalling 1.39ct with a single 0.30ct brilliant cut diamond sitting proudly above.

The race, which is sponsored by the Lancaster based luxury family jewellers, is the most

valuable contest over obstacles for lady riders in Britain – with a prize value, in addition to the diamonds, of £10,000. It’s the second time that Banks Lyon Jewellers have sponsored the race, which is open to both amateur and professional jockeys. The Banks Lyon trade-stand will be returning its position, adjacent to the parade ring, where racegoers will be able to see the latest range of Hublot watches and other goodies – especially for those fortunate enough to have enjoyed big wins on the horses.

If you’ve been following the tips in this blog over the past few weeks, you might have enough funds to buy yourself a watch-strap. This week I’m hoping that we’ll secure another instalment towards the Hublot fund, by following the Celestial Path in York’s 3 o’clock race on Saturday.

If this were any other racecourse, we’d call the event at which we give away diamonds something like ‘Ladies Day’. Here at Cartmel, however, the fixture is known as the ‘Barbecue Meeting’ – in recognition of the fact that, elsewhere in the enclosures, racegoers will be concentrating on other forms of carbon.

Less hard and darker in colour, the carbon fuelling visitors’ barbecues is better known as charcoal and bears a strong resemblance to the sausages and burgers that I usually turn out when I’m put in charge of lunch – which wouldn’t be such a problem if they weren’t still raw in the middle.

But you don’t have to follow my example. As has become a tradition in July, we’ll be offering a prize for the most stylish picnic or barbecue on the racecourse. It may be an award for the best spread of food, the best dressed racegoers, the best dressed table or the snazziest chairs – anything that takes our eye.

Sadly the prize won’t take the form of a flower-full of diamonds on a pendant necklace – but there’ll be a return trip to the racecourse, with a Cartmel hamper including food from Furness Fish and Game, Cartmel Sticky Toffee Pudding and a bottle of Louis Roederer Brut Premier Champagne. Start preparing now and have fun.

An Interesting Race

Sat opposite me, on the train from Oxenholme to London this week, was a WASPI – a lady travelling to Westminster in order to join the protest for Women Against State Pension Inequality. “Be careful!” warned one of her friends, “Don’t stand too close to Jeremy Corbyn... you might end up in his shadow cabinet.”

A similar thought had already occurred to me. On the day that Stephen Crabb (who?) announced his desire to succeed David Cameron as Prime Minister, I wondered: what sort of person would volunteer for a job like that – not Boris Johnson, we found out on Thursday. Not me either. But what would I do if I was accidentally thrust into the position?

Imagine the situation. One moment I might have been responding to the Racehorse Owners Association Chairman’s naïve comments on Tuesday, about imposing BHA control on racecourse fixtures, by saying something like: “Competition is the best way to ensure that the industry’s stake-holders obtain the maximum return on their investment.” The next moment, amid speculation that I could have been making a wider point about economics in the age of capitalism, I might have been hailed as the post-Brexit leader of the nation.

The first thing I’d do as Prime Minister is create a statutory levy on revenue from footballers’ wages and transfer deals. About 98% ought to do it. I’d give the money to sports at which the British aren’t completely rubbish, like Rugby Union, horse racing and darts. I’d be sympathetic to arguments that chess qualifies as a sport – and possibly dance, on the basis that my daughter enjoys it and more girls attend ballet lessons than tennis lessons.

I’d declare a four-day public holiday in mid-march, while making it illegal to travel on the road during the Cheltenham Festival unless you are actually heading to the racecourse (including racecourses like Sedgefield, Huntingdon, Hexham and Fakenham, which provide an alternative vantage point for jump racing’s Championship races). Road-works throughout Cheltenham week would also be banned.

Despite leaving the European Union, I’d be keen to maintain strong trade links with our neighbours - particularly the Irish, who breed so many nice horses. There would be regular delegations for cabinet members to places like Bellewstown, where I’m told there exists a racecourse which is not unlike Cartmel – and where this weekend’s selection is Clarcam in the first race on Saturday.

Bellewstown

And to satisfy those nice WASPI protestors, I’d get the Secretary of State for Work and Pensions to have a go at implementing fair transitional arrangements for women born in the 1950s. What’s the Minister’s name? …Stephen Crabb?

On the other hand, perhaps I’ll just leave the politics to him, Theresa May, Michael Gove and whoever else decides to enter the contest. It’ll be an interesting race.

A Dark Horse

The June Meeting gets under starters orders on Friday 24^th June and we’re Cock-a-Hoop – or at least we’re planning on indulging in some ‘Cocker Hoop’, because it’s one of the beers featured in our first ever Real Ale Festival, staged as part of Real Ale Champions Race-day.

Apparently (which is a word I use a lot when I’ve just read something on Wikipedia), we are Cock-a-Hoop when we rest the spigot from a barrel (also known as the cock) on the hoop of a beer cask in preparation for a drinking session. Jennings Brewery is located on the River Cocker in the Lake District, hence the adaption to the ale’s name.

Some of the names of the other ales relate more specifically to the races. For example, ‘Hurdler’ was created by the Winster Valley Brewery for consumption at Cartmel; it’s a light ale with floral notes and is perfect for sipping with a picnic, especially in June - while the elder trees are still in full bloom. The brewery, which sponsors the third race on the programme and is based at The Brown Horse Inn at Winster, also produces a more mature ale – with added strength and body. Unsurprisingly they decided to call it ‘Chaser’ and used an image of Soul Magic (the joint record holder for the most steeplechase wins at Cartmel) for the label.

Completing the trio of ales from Winster is ‘Dark Horse’ – a dark ale which has notes of chocolate and caramelised sausages, making it the perfect accompaniment to lunch at the BBQ Meeting in July. Maybe they should have put Jimmy Moffatt’s Altruism on the label; he’s quite a dark coloured horse, although he’s no longer very mysterious – having won in course record time at Cartmel in May. Even so, he’s our selection this week.

Dark Horse

In a bid to restrict food-and-beverage-miles, we’re also delighted to welcome the brewers from Unsworth’s Yard – located in the village, barely 300 yards from the racecourse pedestrian entrance. Their four ales include Crusader Gold, Cartmel Peninsula, Land of Cartmel and Last Wolf – the latter named in honour of the last wolf in England, which was reputed to have been killed at Humphrey Head just ten minutes from the racecourse.

Among the other guest ales are: Thwaites’ Wainwright, Jennings Cumberland, Bank’s Bitter, Marston’s Pedigree and Wychwood’s Hobgoblin – which might have been named to scare all the children who are due to come and enjoy the second day of the meeting: Circus Sunday. There’ll be performers and entertainers in both enclosures – including the Acro-chaps, Miss Bubblelicious, the Hoola-girls and Andy Jester.

I can’t wait. Anyone for a Sneck Lifter?

Vote Cartmexit

The next race-meeting at Cartmel is scheduled for Friday 24th June, the day when most people will wake up wondering whether Britain is still part of the European Union. I don't know which way you're planning to vote, but here on the Cartmel peninsula I'm optimistic that we'll be offered a third option on the ballot paper – Cartmexit.

The independent state of Cartmel, encompassing Cark, Flookburgh and Grange-over-Sands, will be ready to negotiate trade deals with nations throughout the world… although there is likely to be a strong emphasis on self sufficiency too, which means that established producers such as Cartmel Sticky Toffee Pudding, Willow Water, Cartmel Cheeses and the micro-brewery at Unsworth's Yard will become vital staples of our economy. Doubters on the campaign trail have questioned whether man can live on beer and sticky toffee pudding alone, but I see no reason why we shouldn't give it a try.

We'll continue to welcome visitors of course - and I hope that we'll adopt an enlightened position towards immigration. The British culinary repertoire has benefited significantly in recent generations from the influx of recipes from India, Italy and Greece. Despite the anxiety-inducing headlines, I'm looking forward to discovering more about the Turkish palate: their taste for slow roasted mutton could be a sublime match for salt-marsh lamb, reared locally on the shores of Morecambe Bay.

Americans, Russians and Glaswegians will all be made to feel very much at home in Cartmel, where many already come to visit Simon Rogan’s fabled restaurant L’Enclume. We might adopt a points-based-system for Yorkshiremen, linked to their propensity to open their wallets. No offence intended, it's just that we will need visitors to spend money in the Cartmel economy.

In fact, I suspect we might make it a law that every visitor has to dine at least twice a day in one of the excellent local pubs and restaurants - including the recently opened Ilex Restaurant, located in the courtyard at Holker Hall. The laws will be agreed through a democratically elected parliament and forged in the fire of the Cartmel Court. I know it sounds a bit old fashioned, but a similar rule of law once worked quite well in Britain, before the European Union took precedence.

Visitors to Cartmel Racecourse are unlikely to notice much difference – many already comment, on arrival, that they feel as though they’ve entered another world. I guess it’s possible that the newly formed Cartmel Horseracing Authority will grant the racecourse some additional fixtures - supported through the Racing Right, a new piece of legislation which will ensure that off-shore bookmakers in locations like Gibraltar, England and Wales pay a fair price for the off-course betting product.

The Racing Right will help us to raise prize funds so that previous Cartmel winners, like Commissioned (this week’s selection), won’t have to go scrapping around on the Flat for minor trophies like the Queen Alexandra Stakes at Royal Ascot on Saturday. 

Whichever way the vote goes next week, I hope that you’ll join us at the racecourse to celebrate the result – because, even if Cartmel votes ‘leave’, we like it better when we’re all together. Does that make things clearer? Happy voting.